


Hand to Hold

by Diddle_Riddle



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Baby Acquisition, Crack Treated Seriously, Cute, F/F, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Feelings, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Surprise Ending, Sweet, The Rogues Gallery, They are the Dream Team, This time they face an unexpected element, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:47:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23665618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diddle_Riddle/pseuds/Diddle_Riddle
Summary: "Edward.", Jonathan let out through gritted teeth, his eyes riveted on the unexpected new comer and its attached source of potential big troubles. "Where did you find that baby?!"
Relationships: Edward Nygma & Jason Todd, Everyone & Everyone, Jonathan Crane & Pamela Isley, Jonathan Crane/Edward Nygma, Nina Damfino & Edward Nygma & Diedre Vance, Pamela Isley/Harleen Quinzel, Stephanie Brown & Edward Nygma, Stephanie Brown & Everyone, Stephanie Brown & Harleen Quinzel, Stephanie Brown & Harvey Dent, Stephanie Brown & Jason Todd, Stephanie Brown & Jonathan Crane, Stephanie Brown & Kirk Langstrom, Stephanie Brown & Music Meister, Stephanie Brown & Nina Damfino & Edward Nygma & Diedre Vance, Stephanie Brown & Pamela Isley, Stephanie Brown & Waylon Jones, they are all friends - Relationship
Comments: 15
Kudos: 111





	Hand to Hold

**Author's Note:**

> The title is from JJ Heller's beautiful song "Hand To Hold", because although this story is mainly based on humor, it's also supposed to be a piece of heartwarming fluff.  
> Hope you'll enjoy! <3

"Don't get mad!", is the greeting Jonathan received from his boyfriend when he returned to their current hidehout: a modern, well-designed apartment in an animated part of town close to some of their friends' safe houses of the moment.

They both liked it here, they intended on keeping the nice place for a little while.

Jon spent the afternoon working at Pamela's greenhouse, the two regularly meet to share over science and elaborate optimized formulas. Edward needed to stop by at an acolyte's today, to retrieve blueprints Nina, Diedre and him crafted with a fourth person. Nothing that would take long and by no means a complicated goal to achieve, Ed told Jon he'll be home when the professor will come back. Therefore, the couple planned a sympathetic evening together.

The doctor was in a good mood when he arrived; except that visibly, their projects for relaxation and romantic interactions have already been _thwarted._

"Alright.", Jonathan sighed, then closed the flat's door behind him. "Can I take off my shoes and jacket then wash my hands before you expose what you screwed up and with who, or do we have to leave within the minute for an urgent meeting with a crime boss you offended?"

"No no, it's nothing like that this time!"

The teenager bit his lip, awfully stressed.

"It's... in the living room.", he completed skittishly afterwards he restated: "Please. Don't get mad."

"I won't.", Jon promised, mildly worried by now.

It was unlike Ed to get so worked up, unless he screwed up _real bad_ with extremely _vengeful_ persons.

"Okay, super!", the younger one attempted to reassure himself. "You know what... go take a shower, make yourself comfortable. Then... you'll see. There's no rush."

Jonathan frowned.

"Edward? What have you done?"

"Nothing.", he lied in his fake –wholly unconvincing– innocent voice. "I'm serious about the shower though, there's the possibility you accidentally bring a mutant sample on your clothes. Put everything in the washing machine and make sure not to have an alien sprout clipped somewhere on the skin."

"The 'alien sprout' charge is gross and unrealistic.", Jon replied, flustered. "As for the mutant sample, it happened _once,_ can't you get over it?!"

"I can't: it left a scar that is _never_ gonna fade.", Ed retorted using the same frustrated tone.

Forever behaving as a drama queen, he lifted his shirt to discover a small bulging line on his right flank, distinct among other marks from different origins, memories left on his pale skin by other persons at significant milestones.

Nope, Eddie _won't_ 'get over' the day Jonathan fortuitously came home with almost invisible seeds of a mutated version of sunflowers on his shirt. They didn't pay attention, Jon left his shirt in their bedroom and the... things, _came to life_ hours later during the night while they were both asleep, then attacked them. Literally. Ivy denied any implication, she answered to Ed's vehement indictments by saying it's not her fault the sunflower seeds landed there and she "can't explain" why they reacted so aggressively, usually this "doesn't happen like that" with these samples.

It was a few months ago; from then, Ed instituted a decontamination session for whenever they spend time in the advanced, secured room of her lab full of monstrous creations. The greenhouse itself doesn't require this process, Pamela doesn't keep her most hostile plants there. Not the most 'friendly' either, but as Eddie pointed out it's easily explicable: "The plants have the personality of their creator, no wonder they are resentful, belligerent creeps". Pam muttered while Eddie laughed, she couldn't counter this _truthful_ analysis.

At present time Jonathan didn't argue, he went straight to the bathroom while Edward hurried back in the living room take care of whatever he has done this time.

Jon was... not expecting _this,_ to say the least.

After his shower, he put on clean, plants-free clothes; he reappeared in the living room, ready to handle the existing complications. Him like their friends in the Gallery, they have been surprised by Edward a _large amount of times_ from the day this ginger kid showed up, dressed with his flashy green spandex and bringing his theatrical showman behaviors in the Underworld. By chance the design of his costumes evolved, in matter of line of conduct however... nothing changed, Riddler is an eternal overdramatic child. Who provokes, induces or causes unprecedented situations.

Right now, Ed was talking to someone. Scarecrow suffered a pure _shock_ when his gaze fell on the stranger.

"Edward.", Jonathan let out through gritted teeth, his eyes riveted on the unexpected new comer and its attached source of potential _big_ troubles. "Where did you find that baby?!"

A toddler more than a baby: the blonde, blue-eyed creature sitting on a large comfy blanket unfolded on the ground in the middle of a nest of pillows must be about one and a half, two years old at most. Edward was sitting there with her, obviously busy at amusing her, when she looked up to Jon and pointed to him with her little arms.

"This is my boyfriend Jonathan.", Ed indicated.

He was kinda nervy about the meeting, ergo he relativized having recourse to his habitual snark:

"You can call him 'Spooky', he says he hates that nickname while everybody knows he secretly loves it."

Jonathan grumbled something barely audible. The teenager finished this odd introduction:

"Stephanie, Jonathan. Jonathan, Stephanie."

Jon sat on the couch at the foot of which Ed settled the girl and himself on the blanket. The former psychiatrist commanded along with a severe glance:

"Explain."

"... Remember that guy the girls and I have been working with recently?", Riddler fished the most fitting angle to broach the topic. "I told you about him."

"The drug dealer? What's his name again... Cluemaster?"

"Yeah, him! Arthur Brown."

Edward grabbed a pillow nearby, his fingers fiddled nervously with the mellow fabric.

"Well...", he went on. "Brown is an idiot, but he is an admirer of my work. As I found out, he is a devoted follower who turned out to be... convenient, we used him for a scheme."

"Where is he now?"

"In Blackgate."

"Naturally.", Jonathan sneered. "You picked a fan, you made him believe he could join your team and when things got messy, Query Echo and you ran away without him."

"We did more than running away, we used him as a _bait_ for Bats and Robin."

Jonathan shook his head fondly. Some things never change: Team Riddler behaves as ungrateful teenagers during their plans.

"Still.", he insisted. "It enlightens by no means... this."

"Her name is Stephanie Brown."

Jon tried to stay calm. A disparaging remark risked a dispute, he needed to collect _informations,_ not ignite a row against his partner.

"So _what?_ "

Scarecrow considered he made an effort: his tone may was not gentle, it didn't sound _too_ infuriated. Ed developed:

"I... gathered blueprints Arthur kept before our attack and his incarceration, I went to his place this afternoon."

"And you kidnapped his baby?!"

"What?! I didn't kidnap her, I saved her!"

"Oh God.", Jonathan rolled his eyes. "You 'saved her'?! Let's start by the _beginning,_ shall we? Does she have a mother?"

Ed bit his lower lip, an habit he effectuated repeatedly whenever he was stressed.

"I'm not sure we should..."

"We _can_ talk in front of a toddler.", the doctor jested.

"... Her mother is a junkie.", he clarified accordingly, a sheepish note in his intonation. "The worst status. The house is a... mess. I didn't know Art has a child!", he cried out suddenly. "I _don't_ endanger parents!"

Jonathan's attitude softened. This is a rule Eddie promoted: not having baits among people who provide for children.

"Okay.", he soothed him. "I understand. What else?"

"The house is an integral _mess._ ", Riddler rehashed. "So is her mother. Her father is a moron, now he is a moron in _prison._ It means we must... keep Stephanie here."

"We?"

"Fine, 'I'. But you live with me, it's not like you can close your eyes on what I do."

"Ed..."

"I don't have a choice! I investigated today, I am not an idiot. She... has no one else than her parents. Her mother doesn't have a job, drugs almost turned her into a zombie, the house she lives in smells like a rubbish dump and is an absolute chaos, moreover now that her father is away no one will look after her, her mom is unable to take care of herself, so even less of a baby!"

Edward went hysterical as he ranted, Jonathan switched from his position on the couch to sit with them on the blanket, watching his lover prudently, knowing any abrupt gesture or loud clatter agitated him when in this anxious state. Jon extended an arm in his direction, Eddie squeezed his hand.

"... It's my fault her father is in jail.", he confided, a lump in his throat. "Art is an imbecile, I don't feel guilty about it. If I suspected he has an eighteen months old daughter however? I would have never enrolled him to this extent! I don't do those sort of things, the girls and I have _standards_. We don't put children's lives in danger. While there? By sending the sole person who provided for her away, that's exactly what we did."

"It's _not_ your fault Arthur Brown is unable to take his responsibilities and didn't think of his daughter first before getting in the business.", Jonathan comforted him. "Don't blame yourself."

"I know... Furthermore he was a dealer already. I won't bet on him to be a 'model' parent."

Stephanie chirped, they both watched her with the intense sensation this all thing will be more than a short-time setback.

"You told your acolytes?"

Eddie shook his head no.

"I'll wait tomorrow. No suspense there though: they will feel the same."

Team Riddler _always_ reacts the same way to everything, there's a reason Eddie, Diedre and Nina have been renamed 'the Triplets' by the other villains.

Although they've been talking about her, Steph felt a tiny bit left behind due to the lack of direct attention granted to her. She moved toward Ed and chirped stubbornly.

"You make the same noises as a... chick.", Eddie discerned fondly.

This amused her dearly, she laughed dynamically. The corner of Jon's mouth raised slightly upon hearing the joyous sound.

"What do you propose?", he inquired, while knowing it won't change a thing: when Edward decides something, neither nothing nor no one is skilled enough to make him change his mind.

"Keeping her for a bit!"

Ed stroked the girl's blond hair, what made her giggle some more as if she had been tickled.

"Until I find a better alternative.", he determined. "Watching over her is a temporary solution."

"I'm in for a few days."

"Weeks?"

" _Days._ "

"Help me Steph.", Eddie queried support from the toddler. "We must persuade this grumpy old ghoul that being nice won't kill him."

Jon mumbled, Stephanie Brown watched the two of them with big curious eyes. Then she pointed at Ed and let out a cheerful yelp:

"Diddie!"

Edward put a hand on his heart.

"She knows my name."

"This doesn't quite sound like 'Eddie' to me."

"Admit it, you are jealous she said my name before yours."

Riddler addressed back to the girl:

"I'm so proud of you! Let's see... how about I teach you a super important sentence you may use very often in any situation: 'riddle me this'. Repeat after me..."

"Edward. _Stop that._ "

Stephanie stood up, Ed immediately secured her with his arms, in an instinctive gesture. Disturbing for Jon, to attest that over a single afternoon he... obtained these kind of reflexes, while he is the _child_ of the Gallery.

"So what's next?", Scarecrow ironised out of the blue. "You want to adopt her?"

This may wasn't the smartest joke of all, to Jon that was it: a _joke._ Except that Ed answered very seriously:

"Not adopt her."

He eyed Jon expectantly while Steph put her left hand in her mouth and continued:

"I'm seventeen, I can't adopt a kid. You on the other hand..."

"Not even in your most insane _dreams_."

"Or one of our friends? Everyone but me is a grown-up or an old killjoy in our group, someone could..."

" _No,_ Edward."

"Then we'll stay at keeping her a few weeks!", he claimed his victory. "Wise choice, Jonathan! I too, thought it's the most reasonable option."

"What?"

Eddie offered him a bright smile discovering all his white teeth, Jon resisted the urge to bang his head against the foot of the couch. Steph took a few steps between Edward and him. Ed let her go, she crossed the small distance on her own to then fall on Jonathan's knees, whom caught her without being able to suppress a smile.

She looked up to him, constantly jovial and uttered:

"Spooky!"

Edward let out a fond sigh.

Jonathan stared.

"She is eighteen months old.", he recalled. "It means she reaches the age she'll begin repeating words among what others say. You _really_ had to introduce me as 'Spooky'?!"

Riddler laughed, so Jon corrected:

"My name is Jonathan Crane.", he told her firmly in his teacher voice. "Everybody uses the short version of my full name: Jon. You can do too, I like this nickname. Only Harley calls me Jonny, Pam as well sometimes, to make fun of me. I like it a _lot less,_ it doesn't fit. So I would prefer you don't use this one and keep Jonathan or Jon. It's simple: three letters, one syllable. Repeat: 'Jon'."

Stephanie opened her mouth, hesitated, took a glance at Ed who tendered her a supportive smile then gazed back at Jon and shouted:

"Spooky Jonny!"

Edward bursted out laughing.

"You shouldn't have introduced 'Jonny'.", he deduced, he found it properly _hilarious._

The doctor sighed.

"She is just like you: selecting the parts of a discourse that can be used against their sender in order to be irritating and make them angry. Congrats Ed, you chose your daughter well."

Stephanie giggled, she climbed on Jonathan's knees thereafter she sat on his lap while he secured her. She watched Edward and flapped her arms as if those were wings.

"She is... like a blond baby bird.", Eddie noted with affection.

"True.", Jonathan confirmed, eying the wriggling creature with a small smile.

She didn't stay calm, soon she tempted again to walk over.

The usefulness of the large blanket and the nest of pillows became evident. To his own surprise, Jonathan played along, they both spent a long time encouraging the little girl as she travelled from one to the other with an overflowing enthusiasm. Clearly, she knows how to walk, but for sure she found the activity stimulating given the high-pitched sounds and laughters she delivered.

Jon noticed that similarly to Edward when he undertakes something, Stephanie seems incredibly _invested,_ putting way too much energy into the moment. He acknowledged internally that she is adorable.

________

" _We have to test the complementary approach, based on what we elaborated yesterday._ ", Pamela affirmed over the phone. " _It's_ our _experiment, it' more logical you come by before I pursue it alone!_ "

"I can't join.", Jon apologized.

" _Why, Ed planned something? Need me to lecture the kid and remind him you_ are _allowed to do what you want when you want to, not depending on_ his _schedule?_ "

"I'll be fine, Pammy. I handle him.", he smiled. "Actually, it's not because of a plan but a... technical hiccup.", he picked his words. "I'll keep in touch, Edward and I deal with this together. It's... unusual, hence possibly tricky."

" _Fine._ ", she muttered. " _It's your problem, I'll work on my own but if I fulfill our project today without you, I will award myself all the credit._ "

"I'm aware."

They ended the communication; Jon exited their bedroom to take a look at how things evolved in the living room.

Ed didn't lose time to contact his henchwomen, the trio of riddle buddies were... in awe of the little girl.

"She is so cute.", Diedre repeated again. "I want to eat her like an apple. Look at those cheeks!"

Stephanie laughed.

"She could join the team.", Eddie reflectioned. "I'm sure she'll be awesome."

"We would train her!", Nina validated. "First we need to find her a stage name to match with ours. So that we will..."

"Alright, the Triplets. Enough absurd ideas for today.", Jonathan interrupted. "Stephanie is here _temporary,_ do not start with schemes for an imaginary future in which she would be unlucky enough to stay with us. This won't happen. And she is a _baby,_ so if I hear once again you want to turn her into a sidekick or an acolyte in your team, you three are officially banished from this place."

"It's _my_ place!", Edward protested.

"Doesn't change a thing to me.", Jonathan scoffed.

The younger ones smiled and Steph selected two words from what she perceived:

"Imaginary team!"

"Can you believe that, Stephie?", Ed used his partner's intervention to his advantage. "Jon is _the_ most willing to adopt you, he thinks of what's best for you!"

Stephanie supported the vision before Jonathan could object as she let out a merry:

"Best Spooky!"

"... We really need to do something against this habit of yours, Miss Brown.", the professor reprobated while the three friends laughed.

A few days later, the little girl was still in their hideout with them, Edward considered it's time to introduce her to the Gallery. He reacted like when he finds a new interesting topic or he deems he has a fascinating story to report: every time, he plays it the most theatrical manner and he wants to have _everyone_ knowing.

Jon negotiated for that he won't bring Stephanie to the Iceberg Lounge while everyone will be invited. Their unofficial H.Q. / privileged location for parties is _not_ the place for a baby, no way they put her in such a stressful environment. Even though... she seems to be the kind who wants everyone to look at her, the spotlights to be directed on her while she performs her show, just like Ed.

"Agreed.", Riddler concurred. "We start easy."

"Good.", Scarecrow approved. "I'll invite Harley and Pam to stop by tomorrow."

Better start with close friends at their place instead of having Steph face the entire Rogues Gallery all at once.

So was it done.

The girls' reaction was precisely conformable to what Jon and Ed predicted: Ivy was shocked beyond repair and unable to interact like a person, Harley was overexcited. When they saw the baby, Pamela _stared,_ Jonathan tried to justify briefly this _temporary_ arrangement. Harleen as for her seemed wooed by Stephanie, so Eddie introduced her proudly.

"Aww she's so adorable!", Harl rejoiced in front of the jubilant baby. "She's like a mini-me with her blond hair and blue eyes and happy grin!"

"Except that contrary to you.", Eddie jeered with a wry smile. "She's a real blonde."

"This is... poisonous.", Pamela stated dryly.

Edward kept the toddler in his arms, Stephie pointed to everything around in the greenhouse. Jonathan and Ivy worked on their projects; for whatever reason Ed came along with their... creature. Pam refused she entered at first, then she supposed she'll have to get used to it anyway, so... Sole directive: she doesn't touch _anything._

"Something fun?", the little girl suggested, she contemplated the strange, colorful surroundings with her eyes wide open.

"Why would I grow 'something fun' here?", Ivy hissed, angry already. "And if I did, why would I share it?! You could steal it from me!"

Edward arched an orange eyebrow.

"Hu... Pam? She is one year and a half."

"So what?", the older redhead growled at the baby. "There's no age to spy and steal researches to sell these to adversaries."

Stephanie laughed, she pointed at Pamela's furrowed brows and mildly disgusted expression to shout:

"Funny face!"

Edward laughed; a confusion of a kind she never felt before invaded Pammy's chest.

Not letting dangerous objects accessible in the flat is an elementary precautionary measure they observed meticulously. No way explosives, chemicals, toxins or needles crossed Stephanie's path.

Jonathan didn't foresee an incident might occur with his _costume_ once he removed the weapons to lock these out of reach. The rest of his equipment is by no means hazardous, he simply... didn't think this would divert the girl.

One day, Stephanie grabbed his Scarecrow hat he left on the backrest of the couch. Ed let her do, while making sure she won't fall from the sofa and descended safely back onto the ground. Jon was about to confiscate the item when Steph put the old, pointy cone-shaped burlap hat on.

"Scarecrow!", she claimed gleefully, pointing at herself.

Then she walked over, roaring with laughter with the too large hat on her head, which fell on her eyes. Edward recorded the scene in video with his phone, making an effort not to cry because she is just too cute.

"Look what we made for her! It suits her perfectly!"

"Awww."

Jonathan gazed above Ed's shoulder to take a look as well; he concluded he should _not_ let Steph hang out with Nina and Diedre. Edward's loyal henchwomen dressed the little girl in a green and purple dress imitating a suit with question marks on it.

"This should be her official attire.", Query affirmed, resolute.

"Definitely not."

Albeit Jonathan conceded, the sight of a toddler wearing Riddler's colors _is_ adorable.

"She already has a fixation on your hat, I deserve she likes my clothes too!"

It's dressed like this that Edward presented her to Selina, a bit later today.

"Stephanie, this is auntie Selina. You can call her Lina."

She chirped with enthusiasm.

"Nice to meet you too... little bird.", Selina judged: the sounds the girl produces _are_ closer to a chick's than a human's.

Then Catwoman addressed back to Ed:

"This is the strangest thing you have ever done, kitten: showing up with a baby. So what's the plan?"

"I'm not sure.", Eddie recognized. "In fact, for once I... don't have a plan. The all deal is going super fine, Jon and I have so much fun with this arrangement! So does Steph. Thus... we'll see, there's no rush. No need to change anything for now."

"Diddie and Lina!", Stephie learned the lesson then resumed her perky chick-like noises.

The two shared a smile then Selina assessed:

"Irrevocably, kitten. Your little bird is so sweet."

"Can I make tea for her?"

Edward and Jonathan answered in synchronization:

"No tea, Jervis."

Mad Hatter looked at Steph with despair.

"How am I supposed to bond with her if I don't make her tea? Look at her!", he completed. "She is like a little Alice!"

The couple shared a glance.

"Jervis.", Ed warned severely for them both. "No way you call our baby 'Alice' while that's the name you give to girls you crush on when walking on the streets."

"... You are right, Dormouse. This is not appropriate."

The short man eyed the toddler intensely then found an adapted substitute:

"May I call her Dinah, like Alice's cat?"

"No.", the two rejected.

Knowing their friend, he won't be satisfied until he finds a role for the girl in his world.

"Lina cat!", Stephie said and Eddie smiled, their baby will undoubtly get along with her aunt Selina.

"White Queen!", Jervis selected the optimal appellation. "What do you think?"

"Queen!", Stephie echoed happily.

Ed and Jon smiled.

"I like it.", Scarecrow authorized. "It holds a... graceful meaning."

"White Queen, March Hare and Dormouse!", Jervis chanted forcefully.

"This is just getting weirder and weirder.", Edward reckoned, to what Jonathan responded by an approving nod.

"Lizard?"

"Not quite.", Waylon Jones revised and Edward chuckled.

"Waylon is more impressive than a lizard. He is more like... a dragon!"

"... Why are we friends again, Eddie?", Killer Croc commented, though he was plainly amused.

He always loved the riddle kid, he found him incredibly funny and a distracting company. He guessed he would appreciate his child, too. As a result he proposed:

"Let me prove you I am cool."

Then he used the single trick he reminisced to amuse youngsters.

Stephanie's laughters invaded the space while Waylon lifted her up and played with her as if she was a... plane. Edward recorded the video, then he hurried to send it to everyone, laughing just as much as Steph.

"Dragon!", she agreed; Waylon hugged her because she is _so cute,_ enthusiastic and... not the slightest afraid of his appearance.

She peeped like a bird and hugged him back. Ed made sure to immortalize this moment in a glorious picture that quickly became a favorite among the Rogues Gallery.

"Don't ya worry Eddie-baby.", Harley smirked. "Bud and Lou are well trained!"

Ed watched with repugnance the two enormous hyenas that generated each an outrageous quantity of drool. Jonathan, Pamela, Selina, Oswald and him have always been disgusted by the two critters who act as _dogs._ This was no secret, they never hid their aversion. Harley being a pal, they made a tiny effort from time to time. When they felt generous enough.

"Harl.", he blamed curtly, not wanting to offend her but no way those _things_ approach his girl. "Keep those monsters away."

"Worry not Eddie! See Steph, they're friendly!"

Edward couldn't help:

"Last time I let these things come close."

The mere view of the beasts repelled Ed; given her reaction, they were unequivocally _not_ things Steph could befriend with either. Harley found a fine alternative for that the little girl enjoy her visit at her place nevertheless: Stephanie had a good time pretending the hyenas are horses while she perched on their back.

It made the little bird laugh.

"That's how we saved the day.", Diedre finished with pride.

Stephanie giggled.

"See?", Edward belabored. "We are the best team ever and we succeed at everything."

Jonathan wasn't there otherwise he would have coughed something like "of course, 'succeed at everything'." in a mocking tone of voice.

For now, Team Riddler benefited from a moment of boast.

Di brushed Steph's hair then tied it in two pretty pigtails garnished with purple ribbons, the three made her laugh a lot when playing little-princess-makeover.

"Can we put makeup on her?", Nina prompted then.

"I can't see why not.", Ed answered. "There's no age to learn how to be superficial. Look at me: I started super young and I am the incarnation of perfection."

The four of them ended up drawing on the walls with their lipsticks and comestics because _this_ amused Steph much more and she recruited them for the activity, as a good captain in charge of the operations.

"There."

Everyone melted when the little girl clutched the gift Oswald brought for her this time: a stuffed penguin.

She seemed far too jolly.

"Penguin!"

"I assume this will be her version of a teddy bear.", Jonathan translated.

They shared the general sentiment by a collective: "Awwww"

"Mich, what are you doing?"

"I show her how to be tasteful!"

Despite all his good will, Music Meister only managed to make Stephanie _cry_ when trying to initiate her to music. Edward comforted him saying it's probably just a phase.

As it turned out soon indeed, Steph _loves_ both her uncle Mich and music.

A few years from now, he'll even be the one who will teach her how to play the piano. At present time, she ended up finding him funny... even more when Jon explained to her he is a sort of mascot among the rogues: everybody likes him and considers him a friend, but no one will ever take him seriously.

"It's my coin.", Harvey Dent introduced.

He had no other idea to distract her, hence he showed his fetish. Stephanie took hold of the coin, she shook it vigorously in her fist, laughing.

"I agree.", Harv commented. "It's fun. See?", he indicated, turning the coin in his fingers. "There's one pretty side and a messed up one. Just like on me."

Stephanie gazed at him with questioning eyes then moved her arms up to be carried. Harvey scooped her up; before he got to ask what she wants, she touched the damaged side of his face. Her small hand landed on the rough texture of his burnt chin.

She repeated the words she just heard but she animated them with _her_ own sense:

"Not messed up.", she said softly.

"You are not scared of me...", Harvey attested, a weird undertone audible in this assumption, as if he couldn't believe it himself.

She chuckled as if he mentioned something hilarious and Two-Face smiled. If he managed to make a toddler laugh, there was hope for him yet.

"Let's see...", he pursued afterwards, willing to decipher what else could amuse her. "I have... a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. You would like that?"

A few minutes later, Edward flipped out when he saw Steph chewing a cigarette.

"Are you crazy?!"

"Don't worry.", he shrugged. "I wouldn't have lighted it up."

"Thanks to this computer program, I can enter anywhere, the camera system of the entire building becomes my eyes and ears."

Stephanie gasped, looking at the laptop screen.

"You can't force her to like computer science.", Jonathan mocked when he passed by and saw Ed in deep conversation to explain his software codes and algorithms.

Edward stuck out his tongue at him.

"I don't 'force', I open her a door to this splendid universe. It's my role given the fact I am the most hyped-up, talented hacker she'll ever meet, in addition to be an extraordinary, gifted genius: a mind like mine, the world only sees one once in ten generations."

"Are you done?", Jon muttered after Riddler's typical, overexaggerated self-praise.

"Never.", Eddie smirked. "About teaching Steph science though?", he redirected the conversation on the initial topic. "You do the same when you expose her your formulas. You can't force her either to like biochemistry, yet that doesn't keep you from trying."

"Not to brag.", Jon retorted. "But with me she was _interested_."

If at first, Stephie manifested enthusiasm toward Ed's sayings, as for everything, now she clearly fought not to fall asleep.

Edward sighed and Jonathan laughed:

"Round one: biochemistry: 1, computer engineering: 0."

"It's not even a fair fight.", Eddie whined. "Since I _love_ biochemistry as well."

Stephanie indicated her preference by a neat:

"Biobometry Jonny!"

"Humpf.", Jonathan evaluated. "We still have _progresses_ to make."

"Why isn't she... scared?"

"This is a recurring question.", Eddie smiled. "I don't know, I presume her curiosity is stronger than apprehension."

Kirk Langstrom nodded.

He saw Stephanie a few times when Jon or Ed brought her here and there, and like everyone, he was under her charms. Be that as it may, she never saw him... like this.

"Vampire?", she hesitated.

The scientist frowned.

"How come she knows that word?"

"She heard Lina and I talk about Bats a few days ago.", Edward recalled the most logical justification. "We set up a rule for when Steph is around: no dirty talk, and for everyone who dares to use these, no bad words. I always cringe when people curse, but now I realize Harley and Harvey are cursing _more often_ than they talk normally. That's _terrible._ "

"While talking about vampires... that's fine?"

The teen offered him his rehearsed innocent expression and Man-Bat smiled a bit. In his opinion, with his current appearance this looked terrifying, whereas it... made the girl _laugh._

"Dragon!", she rectified.

"That's sorta Waylon's fault if she knows _that_ word.", Ed defended himself.

Stephie flapped her arms once more, in a gesture she performed regularly.

"Can you...", Eddie queried accordingly.

"No.", Kirk rejected right away.

Stephanie insisted, imitating a bird, until he acceeded to her request: he carefully secured her before... flying with her.

He stayed inside his laboratory's high-ceilinged room; Edward clapped when Stephanie bursted out laughing, she took way too much pleasure _flying._

Turned out uncle Kirk became one of her favorites. When she stayed with him, he confirmed her appellation of 'little bird' on a regular basis, for everyone's pure enjoyment because they all live to make their baby girl happy. What, given her over-joyous temper is... rather _easy,_ let's face it.

"You won't be mad if we take your dad out for the evening?", Query asked with a wry smile.

"We're going shopping.", Echo complemented and Steph answered:

"Shopping!"

"Congrats Nina.", Ed laughed. "That's an useful word."

"My turn!", Diedre took back. "Since you know 'shopping', Stephie dearest, let auntie Di teach you the full sentence, Eddie Nina and I have recourse to it... more often than we should: 'Get in loser, we're going shopping!' Go ahead!"

Stephie laughed and repeated 'shopping'.

They chatted lightly; Edward punctuated when he stood on his tiptoes and grabbed a flap of Jon's shirt to pull this tall scrawny man down to kiss him on the cheek.

"I love you darling, thanks for the afternoon."

"I'm gonna kill you.", was Jon's deadpan remark to Ed having a girls day out then _night out_ with his sisters of heart / fellows / lieutenants and letting him alone with Steph.

Steph whom was around for... way _longer_ than 'a few days' by now.

Ed stuck out his tongue at his boyfriend then he winked at Stephanie:

"See that, little bird? Spooky may say he is against humour, making comments like these is his way to be funny, it works every time."

Jon asked the Triplets not to do anything they'll regret, what made them giggle like kiddos. Once they left like three overexcited hippie teenagers, Jonathan turned to the little girl.

"Can you keep a secret, Steph?"

Stephanie nodded vigorously and sat in front of Jon on a pillow.

"Very well.", he smiled at her _almost serious,_ focused expression. "So... what Edward told you, and what is a shared opinion by some among our friends is a misinterpretation: actually I'm not funny. I'm just mean and people think I'm joking."

"Pammy, this is urgent. Can you keep Stephanie for a bit?"

"What?!"

With all the monstrous plants Ivy controls and creates, she evoked the wriggling toddler like a frightening creature.

"Jon!", she pled, desperate. "Don't do that to me! Harley is not here, how could I deal with this?!"

"She's a little girl, Pam.", he comforted her. "Not a bomb."

"It's the same!", she exclaimed, distressed. "Please. We're friends. Do not..."

"It's okay. I'll be back in... two hours at _most._ I have faith in you, you'll handle the situation."

Jonathan turned towards Stephanie:

"Stephie I have to go, Eddie and the girls screwed up with unsavory people again. As ever I'll have to attack, gas everyone, save them and clean up their mess. I let you with your aunt Pamela, you'll be nice with her? She is scared of cute things, nice people and happy children."

Steph answered by a vigorous:

"Pammy funny!"

"Certainly.", Jonathan approved. "See?", he told Ivy. "Everything's gonna be fine, I won't be long."

"Jon, don't..."

But Scarecrow _left._ Pamela turned to the little creature who looked up to her with big curious blue eyes.

Pam didn't move, she studied her as she would with an explosive device, Stephanie flapped her arms like wings and chuckled. The adult took her courage in her hands:

"Hello again... small human."

They could say Stephanie became a 'lovely company' among the Rogues Gallery. Or they could say the truth: everyone was her _fan,_ they did _everything_ for her and to please her, they all spoiled her way too much.

At present time, the group of friends were in the main room of the Iceberg Lounge, decorated like an amusement park for the event: their baby girl turns two years old today, they organized a memorable birthday.

After the blew the cake's candles, Stephie watched the rogues and declared:

"Riddle me this!"

They melted. Edward shared the ambient thought by voicing out loud:

"Can we keep her?!"

She bursted out laughing with this delightful enthusiasm and everyone let out a fond sigh.

No need to respond, _none of them_ planned on letting their little girl go.

________________

Jonathan came home after a successful scheme elaboration. He spent two days working on his incoming plan, now he was eager to go home and enjoy relaxed moments with his little family.

He entered the living room, and was welcomed by a joyous:

"Hi Spooky!"

But that just made him smile, he was used by now, to Stephanie's favorite way to refer to him.

"Hello, little bird.", he replied, and was about to come closer to put a kiss on the top of her blond head when his gaze met... a second individual's.

A dark-haired, blue-eyed boy, around six / seven years old, ate messily, sitting around _their_ table in _their_ living room. He looked up, his mouth, chin and cheeks smeared with tomato ketchup.

"Ya're Jonathan!", he stated with an explicit suburb accent. "Da, ya really look like a scarecrow!"

Jon _stared._

"... Edward?", he called next. "Can you come over here?!"

Ed walked to the semi open kitchen to bring water.

"Hey there.", the ginger greeted his boyfriend. "How were those two days at the office?"

Jon pointed straightforwardly an _accusative finger_ to the new comer.

"Who is that and what is it doing here?!"

"Name's Jason Todd.", the kid introduced himself, still doing nothing to wipe the ketchup from his cheeks. "Cool place ya got!"

"Eddie, can we talk in private?"

"Sure..."

Keeping an eye on their daughter, the couple watched the living room from the kitchen. 'Jason Todd' talked animatedly to a giggling Stephanie. Jon granted the sight was... cute. Notwithstanding this, it didn't change a thing, he scolded Riddler stiffly:

"What does that mean?!"

"We... met outside yesterday evening.", Eddie explained. "Steph was at Pam and Harley's, I came back from my business meeting when I..."

"When you decided to bring a street kid home?!"

"It didn't happen like that!"

Jon gave him his best bat-glare, Ed rectified:

"I just... offered to buy him a meal, we took a sandwich at a café. Then he told me he doesn't have parents, doesn't have friends, has nowhere to go and he stays outside all days and nights. It's... kinda cold, we're only at the _beginning_ of winter, the temperatures will get cooler every day. He's going to freeze or catch a serious disease if he sleeps out at nights. Moreover... this is Gotham! It's _dangerous_ to stay out, even more for a child! As an ex-street kid, I am _well placed_ to certify life is cruel with children who don't have other options. So I... told him he could come with me to spend the night in a safe place."

The professor refrained a sigh: Riddler is _always_ a drama queen when he narrates a story. Even if everything he said there is true, Jon couldn't help but note he made the tale sound pitiful on _purpose._

"And this morning, after you deemed you acted as a good person by offering him a night in a 'safe place'.", he relaunched, not letting himself sweetened and willing to maintain his collected attitude. "You didn't ask him to leave?!"

"I couldn't just cast him out!"

Eddie leaned forward and added:

"He is super funny. Stephie loves him! And I do, too. Look at them! They met this morning when Harley returned our girl home, they're already inseparable!"

Jon's gaze drifted again to the kids.

For whatever reason, Stephanie threw the beans in Jason's plate on the ground, what made them both laugh. Great...

"So what's the plan?", he asked while knowing this is a lost battle. "You want to keep him 'a few days', too?"

Last time Ed said he keeps a chick temporary, the entire Rogues Gallery ended up raising Steph for over the past _two years_ now.

Eddie shrugged and concluded by an innocent:

"How about a few weeks? Then we'll see."

Jonathan didn't bang his head against the wall even if he envisaged this response, he rather joined the children back in the living room.

Four years old and a half Stephanie did the introduction:

"Jaybird, Jonathan-Spooky-Scarecrow-Jon-Jonny. Jonathan, Jason-Jay-Jaybird."

Wonderful, Jonathan jeered internally. If that boy has already been given a bird nickname, it meant Edward considered him a new kiddo to watch over in the nest.

"Da, can I call ya 'Spooky' too?", the little boy inquired.

"For your sake, you _absolutely_ can't."

"That's his way to say yes!", Stephie affirmed, moving her little arms like they were wings as the little bird everyone referred to her under.

They were certain she won't ever lose her overflowing energy, delightful enthusiasm and these adorable chirping sounds she still uttered occasionally, even now she talked an _human language._

Edward served Jon's portion of dinner he reheated in the microwave oven.

"Let's spend a nice evening together.", he determined, grinning. "There's no rush to take decisions, right love?"

Despite himself, Jonathan smiled.

"None indeed.", he conceded.

His daughter wriggled, Edward acted like at the same time the bratty kid _and_ the mother hen he is, the new bird got along disturbingly well in the ambiance. Needless to say, they couldn't wait to see their friends' reaction to having a new child. Officially speaking, for 'only a few weeks'.

Jon grumbled and protested at first, but this is more for the routine than out of discrepancy. There's one unspoken yet shared decision _everyone_ in the Rogues Gallery settled for a while ago: they wouldn't let go of their peculiar yet _cherished_ family life for the world.

They all loved being Stephanie's aunts and uncles spoiling her... and as they were about to discover, Jason's too. As for Edward and Jonathan? More than anyone else, they were so _fond of_ and in _love_ with the way things evolved.

Right now though, since it's Eddie who added another chick to the nest, Jon decided he'll let him deal with the clean-up of Jason's ketchuped face, under Steph's laughter.


End file.
